Monday, April 23, 2012

The Facts

There are some things we should get out of the way before we continue this relationship.

Number 1:
Good news, everybody!  I'm going to Cameroon.  Still in Africa, still mostly French speaking, and I will be doing community development work.  Probably trying to improve health by reducing the spread of diseases like AIDs and malaria.  We are pleased with this change; Cameroon honestly looks to be a better fit for me than Mali would have been.  We are less pleased with the start date being in September.  C'est la vie.

Number 2:
I intend to use this blog to tell stories.  Either because I think you'll like to hear them or it entertains me to tell them.  I hope to steer away from just listing things I do.  That sounds boring and mundane, even if the setting will be Africa.  All the stories will be true or based on truth.  They will be fisherman tales full of exaggeration and the occasional downright lie.  I promise to only lie for good.  Or when it amuses me.

Number 3:
Apologies are in order for the excessive use of profanity.  Or maybe just for my refusal to omit the profanity.  I swear profusely.  Sometimes extravagantly.  Maybe egregiously.   Often needlessly.  But always with pleasure.  Nothing has ever broken me of the habit.  You'd think that three years in a professional setting would have helped, but to be honest, my office would have felt at home on an episode of Mad Men (complete with period style hats!).  Plus my boss was a salty retired navy sailor.

You should know that sometimes this profanity may even be blasphemous.  Do not fret, I will atone for my sins eventually.  And I promise you, my grandparents are praying for my salvation every day.  So at the very least they should at least be expecting me.

Number 4:
There shall be no pussyfooting around issues.  Bad things are going to happen.  That's the point.  I crave challenge.  I desire danger.  I am pleased with problems.  And I adore alliteration.  If I wanted to remain safe and sound, I would never left my ninth story office.  With its glorious window view of the National Mall.

Seriously look at that view!  The peasants looked like ants.

Number 5:
Don't take anything I say very seriously.  I surely won't.

Number 6:
Since this amounts to what is essentially a disclaimer, I should go on to mention the following:  None of the views expressed in this blog represent that of either the Peace Corps or the United States Government.  The views are mine and mine alone.  In fact, they probably aren't even mine.  More like they are the opinions I want you to think I have.  Yea, ponder that for a moment.